Hello everyone,
In one of my last posts I mentioned that I had what the doctors suspected might be a very severe chest infection/pluerisy (inflamation in the membranes of the lungs) type thing. This has gone on for several weeks now- bad chest pain, coughing, trouble breathing, bringing up blood, high temperature & very high pulse.
Twice I have been to the doctors- the first time I was given a weeks antibiotics & told to come in for a review when the course was finished (I know they don't usually give antibiotics but they have to take special precautions with me due to my other problems). The next week I went back, feeling worse. It was noted that my obs were still sky high & my right lung was particularly "crackly" sounding. The GP was debating sending me to hospital but I didn't want to go unless I really had to. He instead put me on some more very strong antibiotics & a short course of high-dose steroids to help strengthen my lungs & to try & ease my breathing. The same instructions as before were given; review in a week, come back if things don't improve or get worse, & the possibility that I may need a chest Xray.
Now I am still no better a week on. I am having bad headaches & alot of trouble breathing as well as chest pains & generally very poorly. This is a particularly bad time for me to be ill as I am due to see the bowel specialist this week to discuss treatment for my endometriosis, as well as having my final session of hand therapy (sad to say that it hasn't made a difference :(...).
Tomorrow I am due to go for a full blood check as the GP last week also had some concerns to do with my thyroid. I am going to book myself in to see the doctor tomorrow morning & hope that they can find out what is wrong with me.
Hope everyone is having a better week. Enjoy the last days of the summer :)
Xxxx
Sunday, 31 August 2014
Saturday, 23 August 2014
My decision to have my fiancee's name tattooed on me...
Hello everyone,
Well I've had a busy couple of weeks. I've been away visiting my in-laws & now I've come down with a very nasty chest infection/pluerisy type thing which has nearly hospitalised me (more on that later). In my last post I metioned that I'd had a new tattoo & said that I would be doing a post about it.
Tattoos are still very much a controversial subject. Love them or hate them, they are seen everywhere nowadays. Years ago, people would have been shocked if someone with a full sleeve or bodysuit walked past them but now its seen as the norm. I am a tattoo lover. Since I was about 10 I've always wanted tattoos. To me, tattoos are a way of adorning your body, & if they are done well, they can be beautiful works of art.
The tattoo that I have just had done (well... completed) is something that is still a particularly taboo subject. I have been with my fiancee since April 2012 (since I was 17). One day in December 2012 we walked into a local tattoo parlour. I had his name tattooed on my back in small letters & he had my name & the word "Forever" put on his upper arm in considerably larger letters.
At this point several of you are probably gasping & thinking "Oh my God I would never do that" or "That was a stupid thing to do" or "What if they broke up?". Alot of the people I knew said the same. I had planned to have a heart & banner put around mine too but didn't have the cash at the time. However that was what I recently had done.
I am not going to sit here & feel like I have to defend my decision. Why should I? Yes, alot of people are going to want, as the saying goes "Their five pennorths worth of opinion" but at the end of the day it was my choice. It's my body & life is too short to think "What if" or "I might regret this". I love my fiancee & am marrying him because we want to spend our lives together. Marriage & relationships nowadays are often based around planning for a grim "in the event that it goes wrong". It shouldn't be about that. Relationships should be based on love & the will to make things work without having to worry about if's, but's & maybe's.
If something was ever to happen between me & my other half (unlikely as everyone says we're like one of these old married couples you see who still hold hands in their 70's lol) then I'd still not regret my decision. It would be there to remind me of all of the lovely, happy memories we have together. It may sound like I'm bragging & going on but I'm not. I think the key to our relationship is honesty & trust. We talk through our problems & support each other. My partner is patient, kind & honest, & in return I try to be the same for him.
His name on my body makes me feel like he really is a part of me & shows how big a part of my life he is. Probably sounds cheesy lol but it's true. He says he feels the same about my name being on him & I know that neither of us are going to live to regret it. Like I said, people will have their arguments but that is their cross to bear & I'm not going to let "what if's" get in the way of my happiness.
I'd love to know if anyone else has experienced something like this & how they feel about it. Thanks for reading :) xxx
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
For questions, suggestions, opinions & comments, feel free to either comment below or email me at:
dollytrolley1994@gmail.com :)
Well I've had a busy couple of weeks. I've been away visiting my in-laws & now I've come down with a very nasty chest infection/pluerisy type thing which has nearly hospitalised me (more on that later). In my last post I metioned that I'd had a new tattoo & said that I would be doing a post about it.
Tattoos are still very much a controversial subject. Love them or hate them, they are seen everywhere nowadays. Years ago, people would have been shocked if someone with a full sleeve or bodysuit walked past them but now its seen as the norm. I am a tattoo lover. Since I was about 10 I've always wanted tattoos. To me, tattoos are a way of adorning your body, & if they are done well, they can be beautiful works of art.
The tattoo that I have just had done (well... completed) is something that is still a particularly taboo subject. I have been with my fiancee since April 2012 (since I was 17). One day in December 2012 we walked into a local tattoo parlour. I had his name tattooed on my back in small letters & he had my name & the word "Forever" put on his upper arm in considerably larger letters.
At this point several of you are probably gasping & thinking "Oh my God I would never do that" or "That was a stupid thing to do" or "What if they broke up?". Alot of the people I knew said the same. I had planned to have a heart & banner put around mine too but didn't have the cash at the time. However that was what I recently had done.
I am not going to sit here & feel like I have to defend my decision. Why should I? Yes, alot of people are going to want, as the saying goes "Their five pennorths worth of opinion" but at the end of the day it was my choice. It's my body & life is too short to think "What if" or "I might regret this". I love my fiancee & am marrying him because we want to spend our lives together. Marriage & relationships nowadays are often based around planning for a grim "in the event that it goes wrong". It shouldn't be about that. Relationships should be based on love & the will to make things work without having to worry about if's, but's & maybe's.
If something was ever to happen between me & my other half (unlikely as everyone says we're like one of these old married couples you see who still hold hands in their 70's lol) then I'd still not regret my decision. It would be there to remind me of all of the lovely, happy memories we have together. It may sound like I'm bragging & going on but I'm not. I think the key to our relationship is honesty & trust. We talk through our problems & support each other. My partner is patient, kind & honest, & in return I try to be the same for him.
His name on my body makes me feel like he really is a part of me & shows how big a part of my life he is. Probably sounds cheesy lol but it's true. He says he feels the same about my name being on him & I know that neither of us are going to live to regret it. Like I said, people will have their arguments but that is their cross to bear & I'm not going to let "what if's" get in the way of my happiness.
I'd love to know if anyone else has experienced something like this & how they feel about it. Thanks for reading :) xxx
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
For questions, suggestions, opinions & comments, feel free to either comment below or email me at:
dollytrolley1994@gmail.com :)
Monday, 11 August 2014
Easy peasy home-made crab cakes
Hi everyone,
Today I have a recipe for home-made crab cakes witha zingy lime & creme fraiche dip. This is such a simple dish to make & it's great for dinner parties too. The only hard part about this is cooking & picking the crab (unless you're buying ready to eat crab meat!).
For the crab cakes you will need: (Makes around 12)
1 large crab (or around 250g of fresh crab meat)
1/2 a loaf of white bread, blended into breadcrumbs
1 small egg
2 tbsp of full fat mayonnaise
The juice & zest of 2 limes
1 tsp each of sea salt & freshly ground black pepper
For the zingy lime & cremè fraichè dressing:
1 pot of full fat creme fraiche
The juice & zest of 2 limes
1/2 a tsp each of sea salt & freshly ground black pepper
Too cook the crab:
Fresh, live crab is the best as the meat will be firm & sweet. Pop the crab in the freezer for half an hour- this will knock it out so it won't feel a thing when you drop it in the boiling water. Have a big pot of boiling, slightly salted water on the hob. A common misconception is that crabs "scream" when you drop them into the pan. All this is is the air escaping. The crab isn't in pain- it is already in a coma-like state so it will die instantly once submerged. Let the crab boil for about 40 minutes. Let the crab cool down for a bit before you pick the meat out. Start by removing the legs & claws, using a skewer to pull the meat out, or a hammer to crack them open to remove the meat. Use a screwdriver to prise the body away from the head. There is also plenty of sweet white meat in the body. Inside the head remove the dead mans fingers (these look like slimy brown feathers. Remove the white intestinal tract too & you will be left with the lovely soft brown meat (this can go into the crab cakes too)
To make the crab cakes:
After you have got your crab meat in a bowl (make sure there is no shell left in it) combine with the rest of the ingredients to make a sticky, dough-like mixture. Roll into balls about the size of a small apricot & flatten slightly into patties. Leave to chill in the fridge for at least half an hour. Fry in a small amount of oil until crisp & golden-brown.
To make the dressing:
Combine the creme fraiche, lime juice & zest, & salt & pepper. Divide into small dip pots or ramekins.
A great way to serve these tasty little crab cakes is with rice & some steamed veg, or a salad. Either way, I hope you enjoy this recipe & would really love to know what you all think!
Thanks for reading :) Xxx
**********************************************************************************************
For questions, suggestions, opinions & comments, place a comment below or feel free to email me at:
dollytrolley1994@gmail.com
Today I have a recipe for home-made crab cakes witha zingy lime & creme fraiche dip. This is such a simple dish to make & it's great for dinner parties too. The only hard part about this is cooking & picking the crab (unless you're buying ready to eat crab meat!).
For the crab cakes you will need: (Makes around 12)
1 large crab (or around 250g of fresh crab meat)
1/2 a loaf of white bread, blended into breadcrumbs
1 small egg
2 tbsp of full fat mayonnaise
The juice & zest of 2 limes
1 tsp each of sea salt & freshly ground black pepper
For the zingy lime & cremè fraichè dressing:
1 pot of full fat creme fraiche
The juice & zest of 2 limes
1/2 a tsp each of sea salt & freshly ground black pepper
Too cook the crab:
Fresh, live crab is the best as the meat will be firm & sweet. Pop the crab in the freezer for half an hour- this will knock it out so it won't feel a thing when you drop it in the boiling water. Have a big pot of boiling, slightly salted water on the hob. A common misconception is that crabs "scream" when you drop them into the pan. All this is is the air escaping. The crab isn't in pain- it is already in a coma-like state so it will die instantly once submerged. Let the crab boil for about 40 minutes. Let the crab cool down for a bit before you pick the meat out. Start by removing the legs & claws, using a skewer to pull the meat out, or a hammer to crack them open to remove the meat. Use a screwdriver to prise the body away from the head. There is also plenty of sweet white meat in the body. Inside the head remove the dead mans fingers (these look like slimy brown feathers. Remove the white intestinal tract too & you will be left with the lovely soft brown meat (this can go into the crab cakes too)
To make the crab cakes:
After you have got your crab meat in a bowl (make sure there is no shell left in it) combine with the rest of the ingredients to make a sticky, dough-like mixture. Roll into balls about the size of a small apricot & flatten slightly into patties. Leave to chill in the fridge for at least half an hour. Fry in a small amount of oil until crisp & golden-brown.
To make the dressing:
Combine the creme fraiche, lime juice & zest, & salt & pepper. Divide into small dip pots or ramekins.
A great way to serve these tasty little crab cakes is with rice & some steamed veg, or a salad. Either way, I hope you enjoy this recipe & would really love to know what you all think!
Thanks for reading :) Xxx
**********************************************************************************************
For questions, suggestions, opinions & comments, place a comment below or feel free to email me at:
dollytrolley1994@gmail.com
A very busy month!!!
Hello lovelies!!!
It's been almost a month since my last post, but this isn't down to laziness, I promise :)
The last few weeks have been crazy busy- birthdays, endless hospital appointments, travelling & some personal changes. It's not been easy- & I'm hoping that this next few weeks will see things slow down as I am absolutely exhausted.
So the first thing is I turned 20 a couple of weeks ago. This for me was kind of a big deal as it really bought home just how fast time passes. 2 days before my birthday I was worried that I'd be in hospital for my 20th as I ended up being rushed to A&E with chest pains again (I got released the next day being told it might be the endometriosis spreading to my chest & that I needed to go back & see the consultant as soon as possible). My birthday itself was nice- just a small party with family & friends. I went up North to my grandparent's that weekend & had a nice shopping spree in Liverpool (more about that in another post!).
The second thing is all of the hospital appointments- I am having hand therapy at the moment & have 1 session per week. Me & the hand therapist have both agreed that I'm not benefitting from it, but I want to go through with it so that I can at least tell the consultant I tried. It is a shame as I was hoping it would help, & I am really now hoping that the hand consultant will be able to do something. I've also had various other appointments- general checkups, blood tests, medication reviews ect... the list goes on.
I have received an appointment to see the bowel specialist again on the 3rd of September (let's hope that this time he will actually try to help me instead of fobbing me off!) It rather annoyed me when the hospital rang to offer me the appointment though, as they told me on the phone that there was no record of him having the previous appointment with me (no notes from clinic, not even the supposed refferal to pain management which he tried to fob me off with). There was also no record of him having received or reviewed my laparoscopy results- as you can imagine I was fuming. This was the same man who sat there & told me he didn't want to treat me & was just going to send me to pain management! The lady on the phone was sympathetic & agreed that it was appauling- for someone who has stage 4 endometriosis, they should be doing alot more to ensure I get the correct treatment & help.
Rant over anyway! A couple of other changes have taken place too. Just before my birthday I made the decision to cut my hair short again. It was a hard choice but necessary- I have very thick hair & having it long meant it took alot of looking after. This wasn't always easy, especially when I'm not well & no matter how many times I brushed it it always seemed to turn into a mass of knots. So off it came. However I wasn't too upset as I went back to my old style- a cute & femenine Rhianna-style cut. I also went from bleached blonde to a lovely soft bluey-black so overall I'm happy. The second change is I've had another tattoo, but there will be more about that in a later post so for now my lips are sealed! Needless to say I am going to be tackling some of the issues surrounding tattoos so watch this space!
So, an overall very busy month. Like I said, I am hoping things will start to calm down & I am currently working on a few new posts full of exciting things, which I will post over the next few days. Until then, thanks for reading :) Xxx
**********************************************************************************************
For questions, suggestions, opinions & comments, feel free to either comment below or email me at:
dollytrolley1994@gmail.com
It's been almost a month since my last post, but this isn't down to laziness, I promise :)
The last few weeks have been crazy busy- birthdays, endless hospital appointments, travelling & some personal changes. It's not been easy- & I'm hoping that this next few weeks will see things slow down as I am absolutely exhausted.
So the first thing is I turned 20 a couple of weeks ago. This for me was kind of a big deal as it really bought home just how fast time passes. 2 days before my birthday I was worried that I'd be in hospital for my 20th as I ended up being rushed to A&E with chest pains again (I got released the next day being told it might be the endometriosis spreading to my chest & that I needed to go back & see the consultant as soon as possible). My birthday itself was nice- just a small party with family & friends. I went up North to my grandparent's that weekend & had a nice shopping spree in Liverpool (more about that in another post!).
The second thing is all of the hospital appointments- I am having hand therapy at the moment & have 1 session per week. Me & the hand therapist have both agreed that I'm not benefitting from it, but I want to go through with it so that I can at least tell the consultant I tried. It is a shame as I was hoping it would help, & I am really now hoping that the hand consultant will be able to do something. I've also had various other appointments- general checkups, blood tests, medication reviews ect... the list goes on.
I have received an appointment to see the bowel specialist again on the 3rd of September (let's hope that this time he will actually try to help me instead of fobbing me off!) It rather annoyed me when the hospital rang to offer me the appointment though, as they told me on the phone that there was no record of him having the previous appointment with me (no notes from clinic, not even the supposed refferal to pain management which he tried to fob me off with). There was also no record of him having received or reviewed my laparoscopy results- as you can imagine I was fuming. This was the same man who sat there & told me he didn't want to treat me & was just going to send me to pain management! The lady on the phone was sympathetic & agreed that it was appauling- for someone who has stage 4 endometriosis, they should be doing alot more to ensure I get the correct treatment & help.
Rant over anyway! A couple of other changes have taken place too. Just before my birthday I made the decision to cut my hair short again. It was a hard choice but necessary- I have very thick hair & having it long meant it took alot of looking after. This wasn't always easy, especially when I'm not well & no matter how many times I brushed it it always seemed to turn into a mass of knots. So off it came. However I wasn't too upset as I went back to my old style- a cute & femenine Rhianna-style cut. I also went from bleached blonde to a lovely soft bluey-black so overall I'm happy. The second change is I've had another tattoo, but there will be more about that in a later post so for now my lips are sealed! Needless to say I am going to be tackling some of the issues surrounding tattoos so watch this space!
So, an overall very busy month. Like I said, I am hoping things will start to calm down & I am currently working on a few new posts full of exciting things, which I will post over the next few days. Until then, thanks for reading :) Xxx
**********************************************************************************************
For questions, suggestions, opinions & comments, feel free to either comment below or email me at:
dollytrolley1994@gmail.com
Monday, 14 July 2014
Endometriosis: the next stage- scary times
Hello everyone!
In my last post I think I spoke a bit too soon when I said things were a bit better. On Tuesday 1st of July I had been feeling pretty rough all day. Part of the problem I am now having with my endometriosis is horrible sharp pain in my belly button that feels like I am being ripped open. I've also been having alot of chest pain which leaves me struggling to breathe & making my heart rate increase.
By about 10pm I couldn't stand the pain anymore, I was sweating & feeling pretty chilly & I couldn't breathe very well, so called NHS 111 (the out of hours GP service). Next thing I know the lady on the phone said an ambulance was on its way, mainly because she was very concerned that I was having chest pains. When the ambulance arrived they were pretty worried because my blood pressure was quite high & I had a fever. They took me to A&E & I was really scared at this point. I was hooked up to monitors & drips & I was just in so much pain.
After hours of waiting, blood tests, 2 chest xrays, several ECG's & monitoring, they told me that there was no infection lurking, & there were no obvious problems like clots, bleeding, heart issues or blockages. The doctor was concerned because (warning- TMI!) my bowels looked very full (odd because I wasn't constipated). They kept me in on the observation ward & gave me morphine overnight. In the morning the gynaecologist came to see me & said that they'd probably keep me in again.
She told me that one of the problems they were having was that because I was being treated at a different hospital for my endo, that there wasn't alot they could do. I explained to her what had happened when I had previously been to see the "Bowel specialist" & she told me that it sounded like he was trying to fob me off & that I needed to see the GP to get a second opinion.
The only thing the gynae team at my local hospital could really offer me was contraceptive treatment & pain releif as they didn't have any of my laparoscopy or diagnosis report. I had already discussed contraceptive & hormone treatment with my other half & it wasn't a viable option as I have hormone problems & last time I was on the pill it made things worse.
I asked her if she was able to give me some pain relief so I could go home, & although she was still concerned she agreed, telling me I must go to my GP that week to get a referral to a specialist endo centre, & that I must come back if things got worse.
I spent the rest of the week sleeping & in alot of pain. When I saw the GP on Friday she was really shocked about what the bowel specialist had said & that there was no way this could just be left. She also told me that as well as having endo on my bowels, uterus & rectum, it was also spreading to my bladder & that I had alot of scarring & endo in the Pouch of Douglas (the area between my rectum & vagina). She also said that the report showed alot of scarring & adhesions.
The GP has now referred me to a specialist endo centre in Southampton so I'm waiting for an appointment. I really hope that things start to move forward now, as this has been going on for a long time now. Other than that I am trying to keep positive & hopeful that they can help me.
Thanks for reading :)
**********************************************************************************************
For questions, suggestions, opinions & comments, email me at:
dollytrolley1994@gmail.com
In my last post I think I spoke a bit too soon when I said things were a bit better. On Tuesday 1st of July I had been feeling pretty rough all day. Part of the problem I am now having with my endometriosis is horrible sharp pain in my belly button that feels like I am being ripped open. I've also been having alot of chest pain which leaves me struggling to breathe & making my heart rate increase.
By about 10pm I couldn't stand the pain anymore, I was sweating & feeling pretty chilly & I couldn't breathe very well, so called NHS 111 (the out of hours GP service). Next thing I know the lady on the phone said an ambulance was on its way, mainly because she was very concerned that I was having chest pains. When the ambulance arrived they were pretty worried because my blood pressure was quite high & I had a fever. They took me to A&E & I was really scared at this point. I was hooked up to monitors & drips & I was just in so much pain.
After hours of waiting, blood tests, 2 chest xrays, several ECG's & monitoring, they told me that there was no infection lurking, & there were no obvious problems like clots, bleeding, heart issues or blockages. The doctor was concerned because (warning- TMI!) my bowels looked very full (odd because I wasn't constipated). They kept me in on the observation ward & gave me morphine overnight. In the morning the gynaecologist came to see me & said that they'd probably keep me in again.
She told me that one of the problems they were having was that because I was being treated at a different hospital for my endo, that there wasn't alot they could do. I explained to her what had happened when I had previously been to see the "Bowel specialist" & she told me that it sounded like he was trying to fob me off & that I needed to see the GP to get a second opinion.
The only thing the gynae team at my local hospital could really offer me was contraceptive treatment & pain releif as they didn't have any of my laparoscopy or diagnosis report. I had already discussed contraceptive & hormone treatment with my other half & it wasn't a viable option as I have hormone problems & last time I was on the pill it made things worse.
I asked her if she was able to give me some pain relief so I could go home, & although she was still concerned she agreed, telling me I must go to my GP that week to get a referral to a specialist endo centre, & that I must come back if things got worse.
I spent the rest of the week sleeping & in alot of pain. When I saw the GP on Friday she was really shocked about what the bowel specialist had said & that there was no way this could just be left. She also told me that as well as having endo on my bowels, uterus & rectum, it was also spreading to my bladder & that I had alot of scarring & endo in the Pouch of Douglas (the area between my rectum & vagina). She also said that the report showed alot of scarring & adhesions.
The GP has now referred me to a specialist endo centre in Southampton so I'm waiting for an appointment. I really hope that things start to move forward now, as this has been going on for a long time now. Other than that I am trying to keep positive & hopeful that they can help me.
Thanks for reading :)
**********************************************************************************************
For questions, suggestions, opinions & comments, email me at:
dollytrolley1994@gmail.com
Monday, 30 June 2014
An update, general chit-chat & this weeks likes & dislikes :)
Hello everyone!
Bit more of a cheerful update for you all this week :) if you read my last post then I am glad to say I'm feeling ALOT more positive about things now. There haven't been any developments on the medical front as yet- I have 2 appointments this week. One is with the GP to get sorted about my endometriosis after last weeks upset. The other one was today with the hand specialist to have a chat about a long-term problem I have with my left arm as things haven't improved like they hoped.
I've been seeing the hand specialist for 2 years now as the problem I've had with my arm is pretty complicated as there are birth defects & old injuries that have flared up as well as immense pain & swelling which has been pretty difficult to find what is causing it. Today when I saw the specialist, he was very sympathetic when he heard how bad things have been since I last saw him (in August last year) & agreed that on top of all my other problems that it was time they tried to sort things regarding my arm. He said my wrist & thumb joints are pretty unstable & wants me to try hand therapy again (gentle exercises & ultrasound therapy) for 8 weeks, then for me to see him again.
After a long chat with the hand therapist she said she wants to make me a new thermoplastic splint, she gave me an ultrasound session & said we'll start the exercises next week. It was agreed between me, the specialist & the hand therapist not to hold out too much hope as the hand therapy didn't work last time, but we would give it a go. If it doesn't work then some kind of surgery could be on the cards. I'll update you as the weeks go along so fingers crossed!
I am feeling generally more upbeat after being able to vent last week & am hopeful that things will start to sort themselves out. I've been quite tired this last week & the pain hasn't been easy to deal with at times but I have managed to have a few hours out today. It's been so warm lately & the weather has been nice so hopefully I will be able to get out more.
What I'm liking this week:
The Bodyshop Papaya Body Butter- this smells incredible & leaves your skin so soft & smooth. I get quite dry skin & this really helps keep it hydrated. Plus it's an absolute bargain- on offer for £5 a pot- usually £13!!!
Jubbly Cola freeze pops- the heat is making me pretty thirsty & these are so refreshing. They're on offer at the moment too- £1 for a box of 8 at Asda
Fresh grapes- I can't stop eating them!
What I'm not liking:
Rude people- they'll quite happily walk straight into you then tell you to watch it!
Litter- living by a seaside resort means I like to go to the beach & some people have no consideration & just leave rubbish all over the beach which then gets washed into the sea.
Poor local bus services- I, like many other locals, rely on buses for transport & the local council really needs to invest money in improving the public transport in out area.
So there we go. Thanks for reading :)
Bit more of a cheerful update for you all this week :) if you read my last post then I am glad to say I'm feeling ALOT more positive about things now. There haven't been any developments on the medical front as yet- I have 2 appointments this week. One is with the GP to get sorted about my endometriosis after last weeks upset. The other one was today with the hand specialist to have a chat about a long-term problem I have with my left arm as things haven't improved like they hoped.
I've been seeing the hand specialist for 2 years now as the problem I've had with my arm is pretty complicated as there are birth defects & old injuries that have flared up as well as immense pain & swelling which has been pretty difficult to find what is causing it. Today when I saw the specialist, he was very sympathetic when he heard how bad things have been since I last saw him (in August last year) & agreed that on top of all my other problems that it was time they tried to sort things regarding my arm. He said my wrist & thumb joints are pretty unstable & wants me to try hand therapy again (gentle exercises & ultrasound therapy) for 8 weeks, then for me to see him again.
After a long chat with the hand therapist she said she wants to make me a new thermoplastic splint, she gave me an ultrasound session & said we'll start the exercises next week. It was agreed between me, the specialist & the hand therapist not to hold out too much hope as the hand therapy didn't work last time, but we would give it a go. If it doesn't work then some kind of surgery could be on the cards. I'll update you as the weeks go along so fingers crossed!
I am feeling generally more upbeat after being able to vent last week & am hopeful that things will start to sort themselves out. I've been quite tired this last week & the pain hasn't been easy to deal with at times but I have managed to have a few hours out today. It's been so warm lately & the weather has been nice so hopefully I will be able to get out more.
What I'm liking this week:
The Bodyshop Papaya Body Butter- this smells incredible & leaves your skin so soft & smooth. I get quite dry skin & this really helps keep it hydrated. Plus it's an absolute bargain- on offer for £5 a pot- usually £13!!!
Jubbly Cola freeze pops- the heat is making me pretty thirsty & these are so refreshing. They're on offer at the moment too- £1 for a box of 8 at Asda
Fresh grapes- I can't stop eating them!
What I'm not liking:
Rude people- they'll quite happily walk straight into you then tell you to watch it!
Litter- living by a seaside resort means I like to go to the beach & some people have no consideration & just leave rubbish all over the beach which then gets washed into the sea.
Poor local bus services- I, like many other locals, rely on buses for transport & the local council really needs to invest money in improving the public transport in out area.
So there we go. Thanks for reading :)
Wednesday, 18 June 2014
Endometriosis- upset, angry & frustrated
Hello everyone,
*** Warning- contains some strong language & things some readers might find upsetting
Todays post isn't going to be a happy one I am afraid- I need to vent over the latest "event" in my endometriosis journey as I really am not a happy bunny! Until now I have been fairly positive & upbeat over this whole nasty business, but I've had a rather big setback today which has really pissed me right off.
I saw the bowel specialist today & to say I was shocked & angry by what I was told is an understatement. In my last post I wrote that the gynaeacologist had told me I was going to need major surgery & that the bowel surgeon wanted to see me urgently to discuss this. I went in today expecting to be discussing my next stage of treatment & hopeful that they were finally going to give me the help I need. Instead I was fobbed off & now feel absolutely crap about everything.
Basically he told me that yes, the endometriosis needed to be removed, but they weren't going to do it until they absolutely had to. When I asked what he meant by this I was told that until the pain became too much for me to cope with they weren't going to operate. My thoughts were "It's too fucking much now!". When I asked him what I was supposed to do in the meantime he told me "Pain management specialists will put you on more painkillers to help you deal with the pain". So I then turned round & pulled out the huge paper bag of all of my prescription painkillers (such as morphine, tramadol & co-dydramol!!!) & tablets that I had just picked up from the pharmacy & said "This is the cocktail of stuff I am already on, most of it for this problem alone" & wanting to say "I need treatment, not just more tablets".
Then he asked me about all my other problems very briefly. When I tried to explain how badly the endometriosis was affecting me the response I got was "Yes does sound rather nasty". My questions why he was refusing to do my surgery were avoided with "Well I don't want to do it until you feel that you absolutely cannot cope". I would have understood if he would have told me that it was too risky or complex, but instead I felt like I was being told "Well basically we're going to wait until something goes wrong before we do anything". What a fucking joke.
One of the things that annoyed me the most is the fact that I had been told I would need to have the op as soon as possible, told I needed to see this doctor urgently & gotten my hopes up that they were going to help me. Instead I am just going to be given even more pills & just being left to suffer. It's not fair. When I came out of the hospital I explained to dad & phoned my fiancee- both were livid. I was shaking, angry & crying my eyes out. I couldn't stop crying the whole way home & just went to bed when I got in. I've been feeling so shitty since then.
Me & my family have all agreed that this is totally unacceptable- this is certainly not the first time I have been let down by the NHS or not been given the treatment I need (& in the past, as a result I have suffered with consequences- some with permanent damage!) & tomorrow I am going to visit my GP. I'll be honest too & just tell them straight that I cannot live like this any longer & feel that a second opinion is needed. My GP has been fantastic throughout this whole ordeal & I think that they will be just as shocked as I am. I feel so let down & crap right now & just want the help I need.
Rant over- sorry to be so miserable but I needed to get that out of my system. Thanks for reading x
*** Warning- contains some strong language & things some readers might find upsetting
Todays post isn't going to be a happy one I am afraid- I need to vent over the latest "event" in my endometriosis journey as I really am not a happy bunny! Until now I have been fairly positive & upbeat over this whole nasty business, but I've had a rather big setback today which has really pissed me right off.
I saw the bowel specialist today & to say I was shocked & angry by what I was told is an understatement. In my last post I wrote that the gynaeacologist had told me I was going to need major surgery & that the bowel surgeon wanted to see me urgently to discuss this. I went in today expecting to be discussing my next stage of treatment & hopeful that they were finally going to give me the help I need. Instead I was fobbed off & now feel absolutely crap about everything.
Basically he told me that yes, the endometriosis needed to be removed, but they weren't going to do it until they absolutely had to. When I asked what he meant by this I was told that until the pain became too much for me to cope with they weren't going to operate. My thoughts were "It's too fucking much now!". When I asked him what I was supposed to do in the meantime he told me "Pain management specialists will put you on more painkillers to help you deal with the pain". So I then turned round & pulled out the huge paper bag of all of my prescription painkillers (such as morphine, tramadol & co-dydramol!!!) & tablets that I had just picked up from the pharmacy & said "This is the cocktail of stuff I am already on, most of it for this problem alone" & wanting to say "I need treatment, not just more tablets".
Then he asked me about all my other problems very briefly. When I tried to explain how badly the endometriosis was affecting me the response I got was "Yes does sound rather nasty". My questions why he was refusing to do my surgery were avoided with "Well I don't want to do it until you feel that you absolutely cannot cope". I would have understood if he would have told me that it was too risky or complex, but instead I felt like I was being told "Well basically we're going to wait until something goes wrong before we do anything". What a fucking joke.
One of the things that annoyed me the most is the fact that I had been told I would need to have the op as soon as possible, told I needed to see this doctor urgently & gotten my hopes up that they were going to help me. Instead I am just going to be given even more pills & just being left to suffer. It's not fair. When I came out of the hospital I explained to dad & phoned my fiancee- both were livid. I was shaking, angry & crying my eyes out. I couldn't stop crying the whole way home & just went to bed when I got in. I've been feeling so shitty since then.
Me & my family have all agreed that this is totally unacceptable- this is certainly not the first time I have been let down by the NHS or not been given the treatment I need (& in the past, as a result I have suffered with consequences- some with permanent damage!) & tomorrow I am going to visit my GP. I'll be honest too & just tell them straight that I cannot live like this any longer & feel that a second opinion is needed. My GP has been fantastic throughout this whole ordeal & I think that they will be just as shocked as I am. I feel so let down & crap right now & just want the help I need.
Rant over- sorry to be so miserable but I needed to get that out of my system. Thanks for reading x
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